I like how you described the two "reserved" places in the bar and why they were reserved, hammering in the importance of it so that it really becomes significant that someone is in Cloud's spot. That Tifa must have LET someone in his spot, if she usually doesn't allow it.
I also like that you made him tall, since we all know Cloud isn't the tallest guy in the world. (Still taller than me, though. I'm 5'3" if I'm wearing shoes.)
"Tifa was so far above average she stubbed her toes on it." <---- That line was WIN.
I also can't properly describe how much I loved the description of how Tifa's leather clothing was her "armor" and a deterrant, but that she could wear clothes that covered more but were less armored. It all made perfect sense and I like how Cloud noticed it all. I really love all the things he's noticing.
"And, in some obscure way that probably only made sense to him, she was naked." <---Another line I *heart*.
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. AWWW AWWW. AWW--okay, I'll stop, but seriously. AWWW. (Okay, that was the last one, I promise!) I adored how you backed up and showed what was going on with Tifa, and the beautiful description of how Cloud had kissed her, and how she decided to wear something different because it would remind her she was "beautiful and loved and a woman." Again, it just is perfect and is SO understandable.
*refrains from Aww-ing* The kids were so sweet on the ways they "complimented" Tifa on her new attire.
"Obviously, the guy didn't really need those fingers." HEHEHE
Oh my goodness, Cloud's reaction was just so--wow. Good for him, LOL! My favorite bit in there was Tifa gasping his name in surprise; I could just HEAR it so clearly.
I'm now an absolute pile of mush, thank you very much.
(No, really, thank you. This was so much fun to read.) :D
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chiming
no subject
Date: 2009-04-28 01:17 am (UTC)From:I like how you described the two "reserved" places in the bar and why they were reserved, hammering in the importance of it so that it really becomes significant that someone is in Cloud's spot. That Tifa must have LET someone in his spot, if she usually doesn't allow it.
I also like that you made him tall, since we all know Cloud isn't the tallest guy in the world. (Still taller than me, though. I'm 5'3" if I'm wearing shoes.)
"Tifa was so far above average she stubbed her toes on it." <---- That line was WIN.
I also can't properly describe how much I loved the description of how Tifa's leather clothing was her "armor" and a deterrant, but that she could wear clothes that covered more but were less armored. It all made perfect sense and I like how Cloud noticed it all. I really love all the things he's noticing.
"And, in some obscure way that probably only made sense to him, she was naked." <---Another line I *heart*.
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. AWWW AWWW. AWW--okay, I'll stop, but seriously. AWWW. (Okay, that was the last one, I promise!) I adored how you backed up and showed what was going on with Tifa, and the beautiful description of how Cloud had kissed her, and how she decided to wear something different because it would remind her she was "beautiful and loved and a woman." Again, it just is perfect and is SO understandable.
*refrains from Aww-ing* The kids were so sweet on the ways they "complimented" Tifa on her new attire.
"Obviously, the guy didn't really need those fingers." HEHEHE
Oh my goodness, Cloud's reaction was just so--wow. Good for him, LOL! My favorite bit in there was Tifa gasping his name in surprise; I could just HEAR it so clearly.
I'm now an absolute pile of mush, thank you very much.
(No, really, thank you. This was so much fun to read.) :D